Our babysitter can't handle Jake.

So we found out this weekend that our babysitter can no longer handle Jake. This was the person we were planning to have take care of Jake for a couple days when the baby is born.

She could handle him when he was one, but she doesn't seem to be able to handle his terrible twos phase.

We dropped him off at her house over the weekend and when we came back 7 hours later, he hadn't eaten or drank anything. He has been balling his eyes out. He had been inconsolable.

What happened? Why didn't he get fed? She said, "I didn't want to upset him anymore." Apparently he went on a hunger strike and she didn't push him.

Well Jake needs to be pushed. A lot. Sometimes downright forced. We often need to "help" him eat by holding him still and putting the food in his mouth for him.

We don't expect our babysitters to do that, but we do expect an attempt. How can we drop him off at her house for 2 days? He needs food and drink, and we don't want her hooking him up to the feeding pump.

Grrr. So frustrating...

Jake gets too excited for bed time stories now.

We realized a couple nights ago that Jake gets too excited when we read a bedtime book. It actually wakes him up.

For bedtime, we want him to be drowsy, not alert. So we've had to cut out the bed time books. (He does get plenty of books during the day.)

Instead, we let him watch a signing dvd on the computer. He doesn't blink much and the tears run down his face.

It puts him in a daze and he goes to bed easier - plus he learns some signs.

Jake poured water down his shirt and pants.

This morning at breakfast I gave Jake a cup of water. I filled it with too much water though and when Jake drank, he dumped it down his shirt and pants.

He did this two or three times. A bit of water went in his mouth but he choked on it because he's more used to the sippy cup.

I went upstairs and got a new shirt for him so he wouldn't be cold for the rest of breakfast. After breakfast Cindy had to change his pants and diaper.

I watch other babies.

As the days get closer to the birth of my second child, I find myself watching other little babies. Just today I was watching a mother carry around her son at the library.

Yesterday I was watching a baby in a stroller.

I'm trying to remember what it's like to have a newborn. If I remember correctly, it's pretty easy. They don't do much except look around and sleep.

The hardest part is changing their diaper (which is pretty easy because their poop doesn't get bad until they start eating sold foods) and not sleeping at night (which is hard because you're so tired all the time).

Other than that, it's not too tough for the Dad. For the Mom feeding adds a whole new dimension of difficulty. I don't envy women.

I always feel a little creepy when I watch kids. Men are villanized as molesters so I get self-conscious about watching kids. Because I'm self conscious, I sort of secretly watch them, which I'm sure makes me look even creepier. Then, because I feel even creepier, I start to feel ashamed of myself.

The right way and the wrong way.

Jake's caregiver told Cindy that her husband doesn't have patience with her own 2 year old son. She said men don't have the patience to deal with small children.

She also told Cindy that she can't stand when her husband does things to help out with the kid because "he does them wrong".

I said to Cindy, "Oh man what a typical woman! It's her way or the highway!"

Cindy said, "I'm not like that."

I said, "No, you're not too bad. But you do want it done your way."

She said, "No, I want it done the right way."

I said, "Yeah, which is your way."

She didn't have much of a response to that.

Postscript:

When I told Cindy I was going to put this conversation on my blog, and recounted the conversation, she said, "That's not exactly how it went."

I said, "Sure it is. It's my blog so it can go the way I want it to go. When you set up your own blog you can write your version of the conversation."

We've noticed that parents nowadays sleep with their young kids. Was this always the case?

I didn't think parents slept with their young children. Say - age 4 and under. But apparently lots of people we know - friends, co-workers, etc - sleep with their young kids.

I mentioned this to a slightly older co-worker and she said that about 50% of her contemporaries slept with their kids. She heard on the news the other day that 75% cases of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome occur when parents sleep with their children.

Of the people we know, A LOT of the kids who sleep with their parents have sleeping problems. They can't sleep on their own. One couple we know has a 6 month old in a sleep study. The kid can't sleep more than an hour a day.

Others can't sleep in their own bed, and can't stay asleep the whole night.

Jake has a bad habit of waking up early. 4am. He calls, "Mom?" a few times then goes back to sleep when we ignore him. Until 5:30am. At that point, he's up. We bring him in our bed and let him play for awhile before we get up.

When did parents start sleeping with their kids? I don't recall sleeping with my parents. Mom - did you sleep with kids? Did your contemporaries sleep with kids? I would think not.

I remember one time when Cindy was pregnant I saw a book in my mid-wife's office. It was called, "Why you should sleep with your kids" or something. It was written by some hippie-nazi, and looked to be published in the 80s or early 90s.