We're not happy because we stopped evolving 10,000 years ago.

Humans stopped evolving about 10,000 years ago. That's when civilization began and permanently changed our lifestyles. We went from hunter-gatherers living on the savanna, to farmers.

The change happened quickly and genetic traits that would make us more successful (good with animals? good at identifying and growing different types of grasses?) began to be selected for.

Except that human evolution is slow, with approximately 50 years between generations. Culture changed again. We became an industrial society and now traits like machine aptitude, fine motor skill dexterity became selected for.

Except that culture changed again and now we live in a post-industrial society. Now those other traits don't matter because most of us work in the service industry. Basically things change too fast for our bodies to adapt. That's why we've stopped evolving.

No genetic traits can become dominant because they don't have enough time to spread through our populations. Things change too fast.

This is why we aren't happy. Our bodies are living 10,000 years behind our minds.

(I got the evolution part from the book Why Beautiful People Have More Daughters by Alan Miller. I made up the part about happiness, just because it sounds cool.)

Christmas is awesome when you're a kid.

When you're an adult Christmas is a bit of a pain. There's a lot to do. Tons of obligations.

When you're a kid Christmas is the greatest thing in the world.

I remember being so excited that I couldn't sleep on Christmas eve. It was all about the toys. I wanted as much as possible. A huge, giant pile of toys.

This is actually a pretty good metaphor for our culture today. When we're sad we think it's because we're "empty". Therefore the quick and easy solution is to buy as many things as possible.

Things will fill us up and make us more happy. By the way, this isn't just my opinion. I got the idea from a great psychology paper I read called Why the Self Is Empty: toward a Historically Situated Psychology by Philip Cushman (1990) "American Psychologist".

He writes, "...the current self is constructed as empty, and as a result the state controls its population not by restricting the impulses of its citizens, as in Victorian times, but by creating and manipulating their wish to be soothed, organized, and made cohesive by momentarily filling them up."

He says that America, after World War II, became a culture obsessed with self-improvement. "As the individual's growth, enjoyment, and fulfillment became the single most valued aspect of life."

Merry Christmas!

The self-help industry is a way to brain wash people.

A few days ago I wrote a blog post in which I proved that the self-help industry is useless. (Essentially I said if it worked, there wouldn't be any need for an industry.)

Yesterday I ordered Bright-sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America by Barbara Ehrenreich from the library. Apparently she argues that the "positive thinking movement" is a way that rich, wealthy, powerful people brainwash us.

I had never thought about it that way. If we're constantly told to stay positive and look at the bright side of things, then when we're let down or fired or abused or taken advantage of, we're not allowed to be upset.

It's the perfect scam! A corporation lays off all it's employees and says, "Don't worry, we're hiring a motivational speaker!"

The company says, "You have to stay positive! Things are going great for you! Look at the bright side!"

Positive thinking is hardly every questioned in our culture. It's just assumed that you should be doing it and you should be doing a lot of it.

If we are taught that "it's all in our mind, everything happens for a reason, you control your destiny, look on the bright side", we're taught to accept negativity and abuse.

Maybe people need to be pessimistic and angry. Maybe that will change things.

It would be hard living a "secret" double life.

The other day my radio station was asking callers to talk about their double lives. I think it would be hard to live a double life. I can barely live my own life. Imagine twice the bills, twice the hassles, twice the errands.



No thanks. Then if you want to keep your double life secret, that's a whole other area of effort. Lying every day to one family, then going to your other house and lying to your other family. Just thinking of new lies and stories would be exhausting.



An optimist might argue that having a double life would also mean twice the happiness. Sure, but this would be erased by the stress of lying to everyone you know. And the commuting time as you drive or fly between homes or cities or jobs.



Not worth it. In fact, I suggest it's impossible. No one could spread themselves that thin for an extended period of time. You might be able to do it for a month or two. Maybe.



The only way it would be worth living a double life is if both lives were awesome and stress-free. But then if you had one awesome, stress-free life, why would you need another?

Have you noticed we're always sabotaging ourselves?

Have you ever noticed how we always seem to be doing things for the good of our future selves? And then when that future comes we hate it?

Like we say, "I'll stick in this job and build up my resume so in a few years I'll be super qualified." Then a few years comes and you're like, "I hate this job."

Basically we're always sacrificing for our future, and our future selves never appreciate it. I read about this in a book about happiness. (Sorry, I forget the title.) The gist was that most people aren't happy even though they spend most of their lives doing things that they think will make them happy in the future.

I'll take this job. I'll buy this house. I'll buy new clothes. I'll start a budget.

Either we do these things and then we say, "Okay I still feel like crap. What's going on?" Or we quit half way because it's too hard and then we say, "I feel like crap. I shouldn't have quit."

Interestingly, people who don't plan or sacrifice for the future (I'm thinking people with poor impulse control, drinkers, drug habits etc.) aren't happy either.*

So what do we do about this? I don't know.

*Except for Buddhist monks or Zen masters who "live in the moment.