The other day my radio station was asking callers to talk about their double lives. I think it would be hard to live a double life. I can barely live my own life. Imagine twice the bills, twice the hassles, twice the errands.
No thanks. Then if you want to keep your double life secret, that's a whole other area of effort. Lying every day to one family, then going to your other house and lying to your other family. Just thinking of new lies and stories would be exhausting.
An optimist might argue that having a double life would also mean twice the happiness. Sure, but this would be erased by the stress of lying to everyone you know. And the commuting time as you drive or fly between homes or cities or jobs.
Not worth it. In fact, I suggest it's impossible. No one could spread themselves that thin for an extended period of time. You might be able to do it for a month or two. Maybe.
The only way it would be worth living a double life is if both lives were awesome and stress-free. But then if you had one awesome, stress-free life, why would you need another?
Monday, August 31, 2009
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Why do people carry so much stuff?
The other day my sister asked if I had a murse (man purse). I told her I simply carried a wallet. If I had a lot of stuff, I carry a backpack. Why do we carry so much?
Years ago when I worked at GM Place I was always surprised that people brought backpacks to games and concerts. Unless you were sneaking in booze, why carry a backpack to an indoor concert or hockey game?
That's why we searched all the backpacks. Most of them had books or clothes or containers of stuff. Why not leave that crap at home?
If you look at people on the street, almost everyone is carrying something. A purse, shopping bag or backpack. There are very few people walking around who carry nothing.
I'd love to ask each person what they're carrying. Also, I'd love to ask each person carrying nothing, why they don't have something.
I think you're more manly if you don't carry anything. A metro-sexual, feminized man would carry a backpack and man purse, filled with junk. A real man carries nothing but a credit card wrapped in cash.
Years ago when I worked at GM Place I was always surprised that people brought backpacks to games and concerts. Unless you were sneaking in booze, why carry a backpack to an indoor concert or hockey game?
That's why we searched all the backpacks. Most of them had books or clothes or containers of stuff. Why not leave that crap at home?
If you look at people on the street, almost everyone is carrying something. A purse, shopping bag or backpack. There are very few people walking around who carry nothing.
I'd love to ask each person what they're carrying. Also, I'd love to ask each person carrying nothing, why they don't have something.
I think you're more manly if you don't carry anything. A metro-sexual, feminized man would carry a backpack and man purse, filled with junk. A real man carries nothing but a credit card wrapped in cash.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
You should never tell a co-worker your salary.
I thought this was a no-brainer, but apparently lots of people talk to their co-workers about salary. My friend was a few weeks into a job when someone came up and asked his salary. And I was a few weeks into this job when someone I didn't know emailed to ask my salary. (That person had a reason - they were hiring for a similar position in their province.)
Talking about salary can only make things worse. Let's say you and a co-worker tell each other your salaries. You make more. Now your co-worker is angry and bitter and might go to the boss to ask for a raise. The boss gets mad at you for revealing salary.
What if your coworker makes more. Now you're jealous and angry and you say dumb things like, "I'm gonna look for a new job where they appreciate me!"
Same with bonuses. A lot of companies think they're doing their employees a favour by having bonuses. But at bonus time, people get angry. They were expecting more. The other department didn't deserve that much, etc.
This is especially true when bonuses are tacked on to your salary. Like if they hire you and your salary is $40,000 with a 3% bonus. That's bad news. Because what will invariably happen is that the company won't do well and your bonus will be cut. Or you won't do well and your bonus will be cut. And you will be livid! By then, you've thought of your bonus as a salary - because they told you right out that it was 3%.
They shouldn't tell you what your bonus is. They shouldn't even approximate. They shouldn't even say there is a bonus. They should just randomly give you a cheque and say, "Here's a one-time bonus. Good job." People would love it.
In my last job, while I was negotiating for a higher salary. They reminded me that I got a bonus. I said, "But that's not guaranteed. It's a bonus." The HR person said, "Yes, but we've never not given anyone a bonus. " Basically she implied it was guaranteed.
My first quarter at work a woman in my department didn't get her bonus.
Talking about salary can only make things worse. Let's say you and a co-worker tell each other your salaries. You make more. Now your co-worker is angry and bitter and might go to the boss to ask for a raise. The boss gets mad at you for revealing salary.
What if your coworker makes more. Now you're jealous and angry and you say dumb things like, "I'm gonna look for a new job where they appreciate me!"
Same with bonuses. A lot of companies think they're doing their employees a favour by having bonuses. But at bonus time, people get angry. They were expecting more. The other department didn't deserve that much, etc.
This is especially true when bonuses are tacked on to your salary. Like if they hire you and your salary is $40,000 with a 3% bonus. That's bad news. Because what will invariably happen is that the company won't do well and your bonus will be cut. Or you won't do well and your bonus will be cut. And you will be livid! By then, you've thought of your bonus as a salary - because they told you right out that it was 3%.
They shouldn't tell you what your bonus is. They shouldn't even approximate. They shouldn't even say there is a bonus. They should just randomly give you a cheque and say, "Here's a one-time bonus. Good job." People would love it.
In my last job, while I was negotiating for a higher salary. They reminded me that I got a bonus. I said, "But that's not guaranteed. It's a bonus." The HR person said, "Yes, but we've never not given anyone a bonus. " Basically she implied it was guaranteed.
My first quarter at work a woman in my department didn't get her bonus.
Friday, August 28, 2009
Time gets faster as we get older, but what if it was the opposite?
As we get older, time seems to fly faster and faster. When I was a kid summer holidays lasted FOREVER. Now summer feels like 3 weeks. Imagine when I'm 95! A summer will feel like a day!
What if this was the opposite? What if time went by slower and slower as we got older, and flew by when we were kids? I think that would be worse.
Children lead the best lives. Everything is done for them. They play all day. They don't have to worry about money. They laugh a lot. If this went by in a blink of an eye, they'd miss out on the best times of their lives.
Meanwhile, getting older kind of sucks. If time slowed every year it would mean a sort of slow, extended agony. If you were really old and really sick, imagine how much worse you would feel if every day felt like a month.
"Come on kill me now!" you'd scream. "Time hurry up and go by so I can die!" Some people already feel like that.
What if this was the opposite? What if time went by slower and slower as we got older, and flew by when we were kids? I think that would be worse.
Children lead the best lives. Everything is done for them. They play all day. They don't have to worry about money. They laugh a lot. If this went by in a blink of an eye, they'd miss out on the best times of their lives.
Meanwhile, getting older kind of sucks. If time slowed every year it would mean a sort of slow, extended agony. If you were really old and really sick, imagine how much worse you would feel if every day felt like a month.
"Come on kill me now!" you'd scream. "Time hurry up and go by so I can die!" Some people already feel like that.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
5 Interesting Things You Didn't Know about Peru
My sister is moving to Peru for 6 months. HO-LY Crap! I said, HO-LY CRAP! In honour of her decision, this post will describe 8 little known but very interesting facts about Peru.
1) There's a huge hole in the middle of Peru called Chicxulub Crater. It's from an asteroid strike that threw trillions of tons of dirt, rock and fire into the sky and caused the extinction of the White-fronted Capuchin monkey. The animal is now revered by a local aboriginal tribe called the Kamasins.
2) The Peruvian flag is the exact same flag as the Canadian flag, except with no maple leaf in the middle. In the 1920s a Canadian group sued the Peruvian government for copyright infringement under the 1886 Berne Convention. The action was dismissed by a world-court judge.
3) Peru has a lot of young people. Median age of 28. (Canada's is over 40 yrs. old.) But it's illegal in Peru to have sexual intercourse under the age of 21.
4) The Peruvian language evolved independently from the Spanish originating in northern Spain during the fifteenth century. It is now thought that Peruvian evolved directly from Proto-Indo-European language (PIE), an unattested, common ancestor of the Indo-European languages, spoken by the Proto-Indo-Europeans.
5) Cerveza Caral is the most popular beer in Peru; however, the drink is controverisal because it contains over 100 ingredients including Mountain Maple Solid Extract, Nonanoic Acid, 2-Phenyl-2-Butenal, Sucrose octaacetate and Veratraldehyde. Since 2005, when the Peruvian Purist Party came to power under Emmeline Pethick-Lawrence, Cerveza Caral is available in only government-operated liquor stores.
6) Peru uses a different standard of time called International Atomic Time (TAI), which has nothing to do with the rotations of the earth with respect to the mean sun. As a result, since 1972 they've had to add a leap second approximately every 18 months.
7) Peruvians tend to be formal and conservative, especially those living in the Andes region. The indigenous Amerindians will greet you with a loud, "Buenas tardes, es un placer! Hasta mañana!" which I've translated directly into an online translator as, "Hi, I think it's great to meet you. Tomorrow!"
8) Peru has had 3 wars with the United States - and has won them all! The first and most famous was called the Yamasee War (1715-1717), when Peru successfully defended itself from a military contingent from South Carolina made up of the Cherokee, Chickasaw and Catawba Indian tribes.
1) There's a huge hole in the middle of Peru called Chicxulub Crater. It's from an asteroid strike that threw trillions of tons of dirt, rock and fire into the sky and caused the extinction of the White-fronted Capuchin monkey. The animal is now revered by a local aboriginal tribe called the Kamasins.
2) The Peruvian flag is the exact same flag as the Canadian flag, except with no maple leaf in the middle. In the 1920s a Canadian group sued the Peruvian government for copyright infringement under the 1886 Berne Convention. The action was dismissed by a world-court judge.
3) Peru has a lot of young people. Median age of 28. (Canada's is over 40 yrs. old.) But it's illegal in Peru to have sexual intercourse under the age of 21.
4) The Peruvian language evolved independently from the Spanish originating in northern Spain during the fifteenth century. It is now thought that Peruvian evolved directly from Proto-Indo-European language (PIE), an unattested, common ancestor of the Indo-European languages, spoken by the Proto-Indo-Europeans.
5) Cerveza Caral is the most popular beer in Peru; however, the drink is controverisal because it contains over 100 ingredients including Mountain Maple Solid Extract, Nonanoic Acid, 2-Phenyl-2-Butenal, Sucrose octaacetate and Veratraldehyde. Since 2005, when the Peruvian Purist Party came to power under Emmeline Pethick-Lawrence, Cerveza Caral is available in only government-operated liquor stores.
6) Peru uses a different standard of time called International Atomic Time (TAI), which has nothing to do with the rotations of the earth with respect to the mean sun. As a result, since 1972 they've had to add a leap second approximately every 18 months.
7) Peruvians tend to be formal and conservative, especially those living in the Andes region. The indigenous Amerindians will greet you with a loud, "Buenas tardes, es un placer! Hasta mañana!" which I've translated directly into an online translator as, "Hi, I think it's great to meet you. Tomorrow!"
8) Peru has had 3 wars with the United States - and has won them all! The first and most famous was called the Yamasee War (1715-1717), when Peru successfully defended itself from a military contingent from South Carolina made up of the Cherokee, Chickasaw and Catawba Indian tribes.
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