Someone took my shoes.

Yesterday at our neighbour's birthday party I couldn't find my shoes.

I glanced at the feet of one of the guests and he was wearing my shoes. He was standing in the backyard taking pictures of his family.

He was an older gentlemen. This presented me with an interesting, but awkward situation. I had to go up to him and ask for my shoes back.

I don't believe this has ever happened before.

I said, "Excuse me, I think those are my shoes."

He said "Oh sorry!" in an accent and took them off. I put them on and went home.

I might have to work in my boss's house. That's gonna suck.

We're losing our office at work because we can no longer afford to pay the bills. At first, my boss said that we'd be working from home. Now she says she's setting up our new office in her basement!

That means I could be going to work at her house! Here's my day: I pull up to her driveway and ring the doorbell.

Boss (wearing track pants): Good morning.

Me: Hi, my car's blocking you in, is that ok?
Boss: Sure. Let me take your lunch. I'll put it in the fridge...

Me: Where's your bathroom?

Boss: Down the hall to your left.

Me: Hey!! Do you have any toilet paper? The roll is empty!!

Me: It's lunch, I'm just gonna step out for a minute. Is there anywhere to go around here?

Boss: You can sit on my lawn.

Boss: Hey that's the doorbell, can you get it? I'm busy.

Me: Okay, it's Jehovah's Witness, they want you to buy a pamphlet? Should I say yes?

Boss: I have to run out for a meeting. Can you lock the house up before you leave?

Me: Sure, what's your alarm code?


This will be my work day. Very mickey mouse.